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Now I pay more attention to mutual goals and values, whether they are intelligent or not, and whether they have ambition. Vera Anderson, 37, owner of an advertising and graphic design firm, adds character and reputation. So in this era of value-oriented dating, singles are more dependent than ever on mutual friends to make matches. A common destination for value-oriented daters is church. Lovers Lane United Methodist Church was the place to go. To some extent, the evolution that has taken place in the Dallas bar scene-a proliferation of clubs and an influx of younger and younger patrons muddying the waters-has also happened among the large singles ministries.
But while seekers may have to cast a wider net, Marshall maintains that church is still the place for people in search of a spiritual match. He sees couples meet and marry all the time. When Ginny Hathoot decided it was time to date again after a long-term relationship ended, she turned to her sales expertise and came up with a new dating tool she calls The List. Then a friend pointed out that she needed to look at herself like a client. Like Hathoot, she found that when she applied her business acumen to her personal life, dating came easier.
Go out for coffee instead of having coffee at home. Try new things to meet new people. I would rollerblade if I could do that. Chris Cole, a year-old engineer recruiter who has never been married, has also combined a calculated approach with a relaxed attitude about dating. In his20s, Cole says, his goal was to be married by 28 and tohave kids in his early 30s. When things were no longer happening for him on the Dallas nightclub scene, Cole found that charity events were a good alternative. The proceeds benefit local nonprofit organizations.
At a charity-oriented event, the pressure to meet someone is not so great, Cole explains, because everyone has another reason for being there-to benefit some nonprofit that does good work in the community.
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Having done her preliminary research, she concludes that Dallas is one of the best places in the country to be single. Norton has developed a list of singles she describes as upscale professionals in their 30s, 40s, and 50s. She takes some of the guesswork out of meeting someone new by checking people out up front, looking for singles who are articulate and personable. Then she puts them all together in a room with some good entertainment. The rest is up to you. The parties usually draw between and people who buy tickets to attend, Norton says.
To date, Norton says, she has 19 married couples to tout and 20 more who are headed down the aisle. Having watched many friends marry and divorce, Roger Albright believes that more singles should count their blessings. A homeowner and world traveler, she has no patience for people who feel sorry for her because she is single. Crosskno recalls the time her sister was taking her to the airport to fly to Europe for an eight-month stint with her job.